What Is ‘Show, Don’t Tell’ In Writing?

When I was a child, 'show, don’t tell' was an approach my brother took to sneaking looks at out Santa presents before Christmas day. I’ll show you what Santa’s going to give you (hidden in the top cupboard in Mum and Dad’s bedroom) but you’re not allowed to tell anyone afterwards.

When it comes to writing though, ‘show, don’t tell’ has a very different meaning (one that’s a lot less devious than my brother's).

In this post I’m going to explore what ‘show, don’t tell’ is, why writers should use it and what it looks like in mentor texts.   

What is the 'show, don’t tell’ writing strategy?

The 'show, don’t tell' writing strategy is a technique writers use to convey information through details and actions, rather than stating something outright.

It often involves focusing on using sensory language and physical movements to show a character’s emotions and thoughts, rather than just labelling them.

Instead of saying, “she was nervous”, for example, a writer may say “she paced up and down (physical action), attempting to calm the butterflies in her stomach (internal action).”

Why should writers use the ‘show, don’t tell’ strategy?

Every time a writer uses the ‘show, don’t tell’ strategy, their reader has to make an inference.

When a reader reads ‘attempting to calm the butterflies in her stomach’, they can make a connection with a time they had butterflies in their stomach. They can reflect on how they were feeling when that happened to them and use this to infer how the character might be feeling in the text.

(Helpful aside: the reader can also use this connection and inference to make a more accurate prediction of what the character might do next. E.g. They may think ‘when I had butterflies in my stomach and I was about to speak in front of a crowd, I stumbled over my words in my speech. Maybe that’s what the character will do too.’)

Using this ‘show, don’t tell’ strategy also helps readers to visualise the action in a story. It’s often this visualising that keeps a reader engaged and wanting to read more.

How to teach this strategy to students

The most effective way to teach students about this strategy is, funnily enough, to ‘show, don’t tell’.

SHOW your students what the strategy looks like in mentor texts and in your own writing, rather than TELLING them about it and hoping that’s enough. Help your students experience ‘show, don’t tell’ as a reader first, before teaching them how to implement it as a writer.

The best way to do this, of course, is to arm yourself with some quality mentor texts that clearly demonstrate the strategy.

(Wondering what mentor texts are? Read my blog on that very topic.)

Examples of the ‘show, don’t tell’ strategy in mentor texts.

Here are 3 examples of the ‘show, don’t tell’ strategy in Australian mentor texts:

Book: Crumbs by Phil Cummings and Shane Devries.

Summary: This is a book about a young girl and her father who notice a homeless man down the street and offer him some kindness.

'Show, don’t tell' examples:

• “Ella watched as the mans sat and hung his head. His laden shoulders slumped like the broken wings of a storm-weary bird.” (He was feeling dejected / sad/ depressed / unwanted)
• “A smile shone from the deep shadows of his prickle-bush whiskers.” (He was grateful / happy / delighted).

Book: Suri’s Wall by Lucy Estela and Matt Ottley

Summary: This is a story about a girl who grows up in an unnamed war-torn place. She tells the younger children stories about what is on the other side of the wall that keeps them in, until one day she is tall enough to see over it.

'Show, don’t tell' examples:

• “She could hear the girls giggling as they cuddled up together and her heart ached to join them.” (She was feeling lonely).
• “Suri’s heart beat more quickly and she squeezed Eva’s hand back gently.” (She felt excited to have a new friend.)
• “When, one night, Eva crept over to Suri and whispered, ’Can I snuggle in with you?’ Suri’s heart sang.” (She was thrilled / delighted / full of happiness).

Book: Blue The Builder’s dog

Summary: This is a humorous story about a dog who thinks he deserves more than he’s getting. He quits his job on a building site to go out on his own but soon realises he actually had it pretty good beforehand.

'Show, don’t tell' examples:

• “I’ll just have to wait this out, thought Blue. He curled up tight.” (He was scared).
• “Blue huddled against the back door.” (He was frightened / lonely / scared). 

‘Show, don’t tell’ is a commonly used strategy that increases the complexity of a piece of writing. It encourages readers to visualize, make connections and infer- three things that keep us engaged when we’re reading.

Want to learn more about using mentor texts to teach writing effectively? My Writing Traits Masterclass course is focused on just that! You can learn more about the course by clicking here.

Related Posts:

• What Are Mentor Texts?
• How To Prepare Students For the NAPLAN Writing Assessment
• 5 Tips For Effective Writing Conferences