Persuasive Writing Mentor Text

In my last blog post, I shared three fab new mentor texts that you can use to help teach persuasive writing. One question I received after posting that blog was: "How do you actually use the text to teach persuasive writing? What things should I focus on?"

In today's blog I'm answering that very question, using one of the texts that I recommended in the last post. 

Everything You Know About Sharks is Wrong is a fascinating text dispelling some of the common myths floating around about sharks. The author wrote the book in a bid to convince the reader that -contrary to popular misconception- sharks aren’t all terrifying murderers, rather, they’re fascinating beasts that need our protection. 

What makes this book perfect for elevating your students’ writing skills is the fact that it provides a fresh (and effective) approach to persuasive writing. It involves weaving informative writing in between the persuasion and is much more sophisticated than the tired old formula many students use in their persuasive writing.  

In this blog, I analyse this persuasive writing mentor text through the lens of two of the 6+1 writing traits. (Tip: Using the traits criteria to analyse texts helps you to ‘read the text as a writer’. This helps you see and understand the exact techniques the author has used to craft their text, so you can highlight and teach them to your students.)  

The trait of IDEAS 

“Ideas are the heart of the piece. The central message and all the details that go with it.”- Vicki Spandel. 

The author of this text is both passionate and knowledgeable about their topic. They’ve combined these two important ingredients to craft a highly engaging text. 

Their vast background knowledge has enabled the author to add fascinating details that capture the reader’s interest as they’re reading.  

A key point to highlight to students is that the author hasn’t filled the text with loads of random shark facts that they’ve regurgitated (or copied and pasted) from the internet. Rather, they’ve paused to consider their audience (likely children) and their purpose for writing (they want people to understand sharks, so they’ll protect them). They’ve then used these two critical bits of information as a filter to make decisions about which specific shark facts they’ll share in the text.  

This isn’t about the author showing off their intelligence on the topic. It’s about them achieving their purpose of convincing their specific audience that sharks are fascinating creatures that should be loved and protected.  

The trait of ORGANISATION 

“The organisation forms the structure of the piece. It’s the framework that holds the ideas together and lets them truly shine.” -Ruth Culham 

Structuring the body 

The author has taken the very tired traditional persuasive writing ‘recipe’ and thrown it out the window. In its place, they’ve constructed their own highly effective structure that looks more like: 

• Misconception. 

• Opening statement to introduce the author’s point of view. 

• Explanation of what the misconception is or why it exists. 

• Informative facts that help prove the misconception wrong. 

• Closing statement to summarise all the information/arguments. 

This structure means that although each page presents a persuasive argument on why a certain myth about sharks is untrue, the writing doesn’t feel uncomfortably persuasive. (E.g. There’s no ‘I strongly believe’… type statements.) 

Sequence and transition words 

Study how the author moves from one paragraph to the next, gently ushering the reader from one idea to the next. You won’t see a clunky ‘firstly’, ‘secondly’ or ‘thirdly’ in this book!  

Instead of using the sledgehammer transitions that so many students use in their writing, Dr Crumpton has used phrases such as: 

• Because of this 

• In fact, 

• Even more amazing… 

• But the most extraordinary… 

• So, although… 

• For instance… 

• Before long… 

• Finally,  

Creating a lead and ending with a sense of resolution 

The opening text on each double-page forms the topic sentence for each persuasive piece. Some are long and humourous, others contain fascinating facts. Some contain short punchy simple sentences, while others are made up of complex sentences. Study these introductions and ask: 

• What type of information has the writer included?  

• Why?  

• What are they trying to achieve? 

See this example opening statement from the page titled, ‘Nothing eats sharks’: 

“Some sharks might swim at the top of the food chain, but that doesn’t mean that all sharks have nothing to fear in their oceans.” 

The final text on each page- helpfully also written in bold text- is effectively the writer’s summary / closing statement for their argument. Look at this closing statement from the page, ‘Nothing eats sharks’:  

“Hardly any animals on earth have no predators, and that's just the same for sharks: they always have to lookout for bigger fish (or, if you're a GREAT WHITE SHARK, a pair of nine-metre- long aquatic- mammals!).” 

Show students how the opening statements and closing statements are linked. Read just these two passages and notice how they connect (and how they often make sense even without all the writing sandwiched between them.) Notice also that they aren’t simply restating all the information they’ve shared on the page. Use these examples to support students in revising their own leads and conclusions. Are they linked? Do they effectively book-end the text that is sandwiched in the middle?  

Of course, the elements I’ve pointed out in this post aren't the only writing techniques in this book! There are loads of other teachable techniques from each fo the other traits: voice, word choice, sentence fluency and conventions. Hopefully, the examples that I’ve provided have provided you with some helpful ideas for using this as a mentor text for your next persuasive writing unit.   

If you’re keen to build your knowledge on the 6+1 traits of writing or learn how to deconstruct other mentor texts as I have here, check out my Writing Traits Masterclass. This course is now open for enrolments (note: it only opens twice a year). Learn more here: https://www.ozlitteacher.com.au/writing-traits-masterclass-series

Related Blog Posts

• 3 Mentor Texts For Persuasive Writing
• 3 Reasons To Teach Writing Through Genre
• What Are Mentor Texts?